I care

I had a really full day today. Do you know what I mean by a 'full day'? Like one of those days where you feel like you've done so many things. Your legs are tired, your arms are tired and basically your body's tired. This is why i have finally collapsed on my bed really late in the night, trying to write a blog post with my IPod.

The reason I'm so tired is because I went shopping. Not for myself though, this time it's for my friend Sheree's birthday. It's coming up on Saturday but since we have camp later on this week we needed to have everything organized beforehand. And Omgosh let me just say I really admire those people who organise b'day presents now. They're pro. I went in circles in Westfield today about 5 times carrying 100 bags. It was an enjoyful process but I can hardly move now. So I really hope she likes the prezzies we (my group) got her. Can't tell u what it is yet ;)

So the point of this post today is I discovered some things about myself recently that I would like to share with the world:

- can't stand secrets. Just can't.
- confess too much unnecessary stuff. I swear people are going to start hating me soon after they realise how evil I am as a human being.
- I am compassionate

So you may be thinking, what do you mean? Actually, I'm not even sure I'm using the right word. I strongly believe that I'm a selfish creature. Most people are. I am also very emotional, and a lot of my (wrong) decisions are based on my emotions. But I never knew I was compassionate.

Last year when someone from an older grade died in my school, many people were really sad and crying. But I felt no emotions. Maybe because I didn't know her. My friends and I started setting up situations like 'would you cry if I die?'. Of course I said yes, but deep down inside I wasn't sure. I think I will just be sad, but wouldn't cry. I felt like such heartless person. But today, after hearing the news of one of my friends being in hospital because she is severely ill made me depressed. I surprise myself, because I care so much. I want to know how she's doing and if she's alright. I'm so worried about her I'm not in the mood to do anything but to lie down and hope that its nothing serious. So yeah. It really made me think.

How are you doing, my dear Vivian?

I never knew I would care about my friends as much as I do and it makes wonder if I'm caring too much and it's a waste of emotions. Would they ever care about me as much as I care about them? Probably not. I always tend to love others more than they love me... This is a fact and not an opinion.